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Below are the 12 most recent journal entries recorded in
insaneconfusion's LiveJournal:
| Saturday, March 15th, 2008 | | 2:32 pm |
Writer's Block: Meaningful Words
1. Freedom is not worth having, if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.. 2. In the end we will remember, not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends.. Quote #1 doesn't really need an explanation. I'm pretty sure everyone can figure that one out. Quote #2 is a favorite cause.. Losing someone is always hard. It doesn't matter how you lost them. Whether it's to an illness or an accident. What you'll remember, is the fact that they're not around anymore. | | Monday, June 4th, 2007 | | 10:44 pm |
Minds To Break And Minds To Move
Why does everything have to be so fucking confusing? At this point in my life, I should have all the answers. I should have everything figured out about my future, but I don't think I've ever been in more doubt than I am right now. Sure I'm well on my way to becoming a painter (which by the way, takes another 3 years) however, it feels as if I'm not good enough. Everyone else in school seems to have super powers and does everything a gazilion times better than me. Sure I've only been a trainee or whatever the hell you call if for 4 months, but I've also been an intern for 4 months, so there are certain things I should know by now. I constantly find myself asking stupid, simple questions which I, without a doubt, should know the answer to. It feels as if everyone is talking about me behind my back and there's nothing I can do about it. I feel like, no matter how long I run or how fast I run, I never get anywhere. I'm stuck in the same place I've always been in. Stuck in the same hole. I some times feel as if it's on a kindergarten level, which is silly I know. But hey, I can't help how I feel. The only person I would ever want to talk to about this, isn't here anymore. Sadly, he passed away 7½ years ago. I never thought it'd be humanly possibly to miss someone, the way I miss him. He was my rock. He tought my to write my name when I was 3 years old. He tought me to read fluently at the age of 4. And I'm not even kidding. I basically owe everything to him. Some may know and some may not know, but I write poetry and this is the most recent one I wrote. I didn't mean for it to be about him, but it turned out that way anyway. Some of the things aren't right in that context (like the blood and the bedroom floor) but .. whatever. My cousin told me it's the best I've written so far. And I have been writing for about 10 years, so ... Minds To Break And Minds To Move Lying alone in my bed Thinking about what you said You promised you'd always be around You said it all without a sound The bedroom floor covered in blood Whispering a silent question to God Why does it have to be this way? Why couldn't you just let him stay? I miss him every day, so very much I put upon you my faith and trust You took away what mattered the most to me Now he'll never get a chance to see The chance to see how happy I am That I have finally found a man A man who lets me be me And doesn't try to change for everyone to see I feel like I have something to prove Minds to break and minds to move A chance to prove that I can be free Free to finally be me ... | | Sunday, June 3rd, 2007 | | 9:05 pm |
Me.. The moviestar
Yes indeed. I am going to be an extra in a movie. A movie by the Danish director Niels Arden Oplev. He also directed 'Drømmen' and 'Fukssvansen' The scene takes place at Crazy Daisy. A club I had sworn I would never ever set my foot in again, but this is different though. I don't have to pay to get in, so I'm excused. The movie is about a christian girl who's a member of a religious cult and she rebels against all it stands for. She starts going to clubs, wearing make up and ends up falling in love with a non-christian boy. So the movie is basically about her and the things she's dealing with. I can't wait to see the movie. I think it's gonna be great... On a different note. Everyone knows about myspace by now, and if you don't you probably live on Mars. However, there's a site called Trig.com It's pretty confusing to begin with, but eventually you get the hang of it. I've been there for a few days and it's going okay so far. I'm not ready to give up on my myspace yet. Don't know if I'll ever be, but .. who says you can't be addicted to both? :D http://trig.com/completely_incomplete <----------- If you wanna add me Current Music: Fall Out Boy - Thanks For The Memories | | Thursday, March 29th, 2007 | | 5:23 pm |
| | Sunday, February 18th, 2007 | | 4:34 pm |
Confusion?!
Why is it that life has to be so damn complicated? You think you've got all the answers and has everything figured out! And when it turns out you don't, you get confused. Although it was expected and you knew it was coming, it's still messes you up. I thought I had found the answer to what my future would bring. As it, once again, turns out I got majorly screwed. And not in a good way. Someone sort of made a promise to me and they couldn't keep it. They've been leading me on for about 6 months, telling me I would get something and then I don't. I don't understand what it is, that makes people think it's okay to just mess with people's heads. 'Cause it's not! Regardless of what anyone says. You can't just lead someone on and expect it not to hurt, when they realize that things aren't what they seem to be. However, this blog is not just a sob story. I actually had an awesome weekend. My cousin, the bf and I was invited to a party at a friends place, about 2½ hours away from where we live. We told him we couldn't make it. Or at least that we didn't know if we could. We then decided (on the day of the party) to go to his place, and not tell him about it. The plan was to call him when we were there and ask if he'd give us something to drink if we came and he said he would. Pretty fucked if he said no, huh? :) Anyway, we hang up and call him about 2 minutes later asking where he is. He asks where we are and we tell him that we're already there. The look on his face when he saw us was priceless. Totally worth it. I guess that's what you do for friends. Anyone who knows him, should consider themselves to be amongst the luckiest people in the world. And the party itself, of course, was a slam dunk. Don't think I ever acted the way I did that night. At least not to my knowlegde. Meaning I can't remember :P It was a fun night. But the cleaning up the next day .. not so fun! I'll try and update this more than I have recently. Not that anyone really cares, but it gives me something to do :) | | Tuesday, February 6th, 2007 | | 4:28 pm |
changes
First the good news. I finally got an apprentice ship! Well, sort of. It's at the school I went to, so it's not the best situation, but I'm sure I'll survive. It's only been a week and a day since I started. The education itself doesn't end until June 25 2010, so I have a looooong way to go. The friend I mentioned in my last entry .. the one who's an underground pro bmx rider. Not so pro anymore. Turns out that he had a car accident a few years ago (that I, for obvious reasons, didn't know about until now) He can't even ride his bike anymore. Well, he can't do trix anymore cause when he tries, his back hurts like hell. I really feel sorry for him, cause he had such a promising career. Anybody that knows him, should consider themselves lucky! There are no words to describe how I feel about the lady below these sentences. You should all add her to myspace, if you have an account. And if you don't have an account, make one just so you can add her. She's amazing!
 Current Mood:  tired | | Saturday, October 21st, 2006 | | 11:05 pm |
lucky?
I realize it's been a while since I wrote in my livejournal. It took a good friend to get me started again :D Things are really starting to look okay for me, I guess. Almost 2 months ago I won about $1700 in a gameshow on tv. I never won anything in my life, except a crappy cd, a shirt and some candy, so that money really came in handy. The other day I won a dvd on the radio. Not too exiting but still. I finished school and should be ready to start an education as a painter. I have pics of it on my myspace. People that know me, will know the link. My boyfriend and I have been together for more than 3 years and despite the fact that things are some times rough, I love him. After searching for a friend for almost 3 years, I finally got an email the other day. Turns out he's been doing pretty good. He's an underground pro bmx rider and I sincerely wish him all the best of luck. He deserve it more than anyone else I know. On a not so happy note ... I really don't understand why some assholes feel the need to pose as someone else on the internet, tricking people into believing that they're someone they're not? I honestly don't get it. And when it hurts people I know, I really get upset. And the fact that I can't do anything about it, pisses me off even more. Monday's a bitch Tuesday ain't well Wednesday suck And Thursday's gone to hell Friday's a pain Saturday's a blast and by Sunday it's all in the past Current Mood:  annoyedCurrent Music: Stone Sour - Through Glass | | Tuesday, January 25th, 2005 | | 1:49 pm |
pissed
Okay, I'm at this work thingie that's also school. It's hard to explain. Either way, we were eating and this idiot is about to take our water and I tell him to get some of his own and he gets sort of pissed about it. I didn't care. Then he starts to ask for a napkin or whatever and I just let him cause I don't wanna spend more time bitching about it, so this other guy (new btw) mocks me and says "Go get some yourself" I get pissed and tell him not to mock me or he'll get in trouble, because I don't wanna put up with any of their crap. So he starts doing whatever and I tell him not to. Then this girl sitting next to him (A real man whore, sleeps with everything that has legs) laughs and I bitch at her and tell her not to. Then I mumble "bitch" which she heard I guess and so the guy, who in the beginning wanted some water asks why I called her a fat bitch and I say I didn't. He asks again and I ask if he has a problem with his hearing and say I didn't say that. Okay so I lied about calling her a bitch but I don't care. I could have said I didn, but that would have made the discussion even longer and there would be no room for it to be here on livejournal Current Mood: bitchyCurrent Music: Jay-z/Linkin Park - Numb/encore | | Wednesday, January 19th, 2005 | | 2:51 pm |
A Thousand Black Angels
A Thousand Black Angels A thousand black angels flew in that night and saved me from hell on earth A thousand black angels gave me salvation Each and everyone of them saw my pain saw my misery A thousand black angels gave me freedom freedom to be me just me A thousand black angels heard me sigh heard my last breath A thousand black angels saw me cry heard me cry A thousand black angels saved me from this place this God forsaken place A thousand black angels flew in that night and saved me from hell on earth Current Mood:  bouncyCurrent Music: The Starting Line - Best Of Me | | Friday, January 7th, 2005 | | 1:27 pm |
| | 11:36 am |
Myspace.com
Oh how I hate when they are conducting routine maintenance. It sucks, but oh well. We have to live. haha. I managed to confuse Jaclyn last time. yay! HA .. or .. I'm weird today. I don't know why. Oh well Half an hour ago I saw this kid and I instantly felt like beating the shit out of him. He is the one who once slept with my 13-year-old cousin in a bush somewhere and made her cry because he didn't believe her when she told him she was a virgin. I wanna kick his ass so badly. Cut his balls off with a spoon or something. My brother (he and my cousin are really tight, despite the 10 years of difference in age) almost kicked his ass like 2 weeks ago at this x-mas party thingie. He screamed and yelled, that if he EVER layed his hands on her again, he'd bring an army and simply beat the living crap outta him and trust me .. he will. I searched my workplace to see if I could find the kid, but it seemed as if he had dissappeared from the fact of the earth. Good thing for him! Benji is mad sex (I agree with Benj Jaclyn. Too much Joel. hehe....... or something) Current Mood: bitchy | | Wednesday, January 5th, 2005 | | 10:22 am |
craaap
This is like the worst day ever and it barely started. Well, first of all, my stomach hurts like hell. I'm stitting at a computer all day so it's really not that bad, but when I stand up, it sucks. I took pills and all, but they haven't started working yet! For some stupid reason! Maybe I should take more? :):) Okay, the whole thing about me getting this account is because Jaclyn does. Well, I used to have an a ccount on here, but I have no idea what happened to it, so I made a new one. And this is my first entry. *Feels proud* As far as I remember (My memory sucks) I think I saw a link to this on Jaclyn's My Space profile and yeah. It amazes me how many people poses as someone they're not. There's like 50 Joel's and Benji's on there. I did a simple search on Lars Ulrich from Metallica and what do you know. Someone is even posing as him. How fucted up is that? Either way, I wrote the ones I found and I wrote in Danish, so if they don't respond in Danish, they're screwed. Oh well, my stomach still hurts and I have to be at work for another 4½ hours, making a crappy website about myself. Yay! NOT!!! :( Current Mood: artisticCurrent Music: Goo Goo Dolls - Broadway |
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